Today in church, for class, they had this counselor come talk to us about the seriousness/severity of pornography. It is the easiest thing to access and one of the most devastating to families. Most of us have heard this before, but he took a different approach. He is a professional counselor that deals strictly with porn addicts. I liked that you can apply everything he said to any type of addiction (hmmm -chocolate anyone?).
He explained how in our body there are 3 survival instincts: survival at all costs, to avoid pain, and to seek pleasure. Also, when you experience boredom, loneliness, anger, stress, or tiredness, you gear into survival mode.
Your brain had stores of things that know will make you feel good should you feel threatened emotionally or otherwise. That's when you reach for that chocolate and that's why porn addicts reach for that picture. This is also why addictions are so difficult to manage. He emphasized that it's not the temptation that is bad, but the act. And that is why repentance is an ongoing process and not an event.
I am grateful for a husband that is aware of the danger of pornography and stays far far away. I am scared for my son who will undoubtedly go to school or be doing homework on the internet and see something that will offend his spirit. How grateful I am for a loving Heavenly Father who warns us of these dangers, and if need be will help us back.
Heavy subject I know, but I was so impressed by this today and feel strongly that I needed to share.
Meet the Shakespeare's
Easton(5), Kelly, Dave, Luke(2)
About Me
- kelly
- I'm just a girl trying to be Supermom, June Cleaver and Martha Stewart, all at once. You get to see me laughing and crying along the way because it doesn't happen often. But every day I can see that life sure is good in my corner of the world.
6 comments:
Thanks for sharing, I guess I never realized the survival mode before when you are under stress, you look for something to help you out. It is just what I needed to hear today. Thanks.
Interesting!! We had a lesson on Pornography also, only ours was a different approach. They gave us some statistic that were scary. Of 2007 graduates, 100% have seen porn. Of kids age 11-17 97% have seen porn at one time or another, and the average age that kids see pornography is 11. Can you believe that?? 40% of WOMEN are addicted to pornography. Sometimes through dime novels, and not pictures. Anything that stimulates them. We talked about how to help our children avoid it, and here are some of the suggestions we were given. 1. Communication, talk to your children about it. If they don’t hear it from parents, they WILL hear it from the world. 2. Put the t.v./computer in the F.R. Get them out of the bedroom. I can’t remember the rest, but I figured those 2 were worth posting. Thanks for sharing your lesson with us.
So true . . . that message is so needed because there is such a belief that "boys wil be boys" and that it isn't that big of a deal if it's just a photo or video (more non-LDS). It's sad that people don't know how destructive it is until it's too late.
I agree mom. I think a lot of us have one vice or another that can keep us from being /giving all that we can, and I thought it was helpful to know the scientific 'why' trigger. When you can realize that it's not b/c you're weak, but human that you're continually tempted it's easier to resist. Thanks for your input. Great suggestions Heidi. That's what this guy said too: talk, talk, talk to each other!
Kelly,
what did this counselor say about breaking your habbits that are in your survival mode.
ie. how do you stop eating when you are bored ??
He said that you basically have to train yourself into realizing that it's instinct that's telling you what to do, understanding what prompted the desire (bored, lonely, etc), and then dealing with/changing that feeling rather than just filling it. Way easier said than done, but for me and my treat addiction it helps me to realize that I'll instinctually probably always get that desire, but there's an underlying feeling causing it.
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